Path to Success and Happiness-No.2

This article is collection of Jireenya Badhaatu’s FB page February 2016 posts.
Modarate talks– the more you talk much, the more you lose peace of mind. The Mind is wasted with unnecessary information. When we backbite and slander someone, it may seem to us that we are getting pleasure. But we are making our life worse and delving in sins. After some time it causes painful regret and sorrow. Backbiting and slandering throw hatred and suspicion in our hearts. Then we worry about what doesn’t concern us. We loss peace of mind. The day I get peace of mind most is the day I mix with people less and spend my time with reading. The more you chat on the internet, the more you lose peace of mind, is it not?
When you expect something and if it doesn’t happen, don’t be frustrated and hopeless. Know that Allah has prevented something bad from you although it seems to you good. Be patient and hope for good. If it was as my expectation in writing work, I would not have written these lines. Alhamdulillah All thanks be to Allah Who has saved us from our evils and expectations

We are so impatient to succeed. After we had planted a plant, we need its fruit after some hours. But success doesn’t come without patience and struggle. It needs long journey and time. The more you struggle, the closer you’re to success. Success is matter of journey. Everyday you should strive to reach at your destination. When you reach at your destination, here it is said you succeeded. Water everyday plant of your success so that you will harvest great deal of fruits tomorrow. Don’t stop from growing up.
When we try to please Allah, what we gain are peace of mind, sakina(tranquility) and guidance. When we try to please people, what we gain are headache, loss of peace of mind and frustration. So to live happy and successful life our strives should be for the sake of Allah.
Lying is root of evils. When you start lying, you lose honesty ,respect,opportunity, love,baraka(blessings),peace of mind and etc. Heart is corrupted due to lying. So hold your tongue from speaking false if you want salvation.
When you face test or sadness, don’t be hopeless and depressed. Tests or sadness are not to degrade you rather to elevate you to higher status. Be patient. If only you are patient this test, it will become cause of your elevation.
If you are said, “You will die tomorrow?”, what shall you do? Do you work hard? Do you perform salah more? Do you give sadaka more? Do you ask forgiveness more? Do you leave all sins you’re doing? Really what shall you do? What shall I do? Think death in this manner. You don’t know when death comes to you. It is sudden snatch. Do good deeds as much as you can. Run away from behaving bad and evil deeds. Stay away from wasting time on worthless things. Wasting time is worse than death. It’s source of worst regret. “Alas! I wish I had come back, I wish I had done good deeds. Woe to me I wish I had followed Messenger of Allah(SAW).” These are some expressions of regrets someone will say after everything had finished. There is no second chance. Concluded.
Don’t upload all your information in social media. Don’t upload what you eat, how your home look like, what you wear, whom you loved, who is your wife, who is your husband, what you do at every moments. These all things bring to you great damage. It makes evil eye strikes the person, envy and hatred spread among people. Keep your information tight.
 
Today holding fast to Islam is thought as entering to prison cage and losing every worldly things. They say “Islam makes everything haram. What’s wrong with having girlfriend/boyfriend? What’s wrong with mixing opposite gender? What’s wrong with such and such?” They list numerous questions. Indeed when human vision blurred, hearts turn away from true guidance, when sins and corruption become rampant, then it is easy to consider Islam as prison cage because Islam restricts vain desires and spreading of corruption. Islam wants humanity to gain its true freedom and happiness by purifying their hearts from dirt and evils. Islam is not prison cage. Rather it is vast arena that gives you true freedom, happiness, guidance and success. The one who entered into Islam completely is the one who has gained true freedom and happiness. He/she free himself/herself from following vain desires and shaytan that bring ultimate destructions. Rather than being embarrassed, be proud of Islam. Lift your head by Islam. Regard it as the most precious grace that Allah has granted you. See those around you who have lost Islam how their life is going on! They lead unhappy and depressed life. When the person turns away from the remembrance of Allah, sheytan is his qarin(intimate friend). (See Al-Qur’an 43:36-37) Due to this they think Islam as prison cage while the reality is opposite of this.
To gain perishing gain of this world, don’t cheat. The thing you gain through cheating and unlawful ways has no baraka(blessing). Rather, it spoils your wealth and wellbeing as water is polluted by litter. Be content with what you have In sha Allah, Allah will increase for you. No matter how much we are greedy, we never gain more than what’s decreed for us. Rather if we are greedy, we lose what we have. By worrying for your future, don’t burden yourself more than what you can bear. Just trust in Allah.
Think back, look for a moment your yesterday’s life. How was it? How did it pass? When looking back at our yesterday’s life, we should try to improve ourselves. We should not lead the same life. Of course, when you remember some painful events, it may hurt your inner. But forget those things by taking lessons from them. In my life one mistake taught me great lesson although it hurt my inner. What I failed to change through reading many books, Alhamdulillah I changed that character through mistake. So learn from mistake. Don’t harbour grudges, envy and hatred, they poison you. Harbouring grudge, envy, hatred and etc, drags you back from improvement and purification of soul. Write down your defects, then try your best to fix. As long as you strive to fix them InshaAllah Allah helps you. For a time being write some defects. For example let us say,”InshaAllah in this week I get rid of hatred….” Read books about purification of soul (tazkiya). More than this pondering over Qur’an and studying it purify your soul, heal your heart, build your personality.
“There is no shortcut for success.” You should strive hard to achieve success.
“I love her but she doesn’t love me. What shall I do?”
This question is asked by many young men even it may be asked by young women. Of course controlling love is not easy. It asks patience and struggle. Let me answer this question in this way. If you want her to take as girlfriend, indeed she is right and wise person because she wants to preserve her chastity and dignity. But you’re approaching her in a wrong way. When you input wrong information into computer, it gives you wrong output/result. She is saying to you, I don’t like you because you’re going to destroy my life through haram/unlawful relationship. Of course as human being you may fall in love from her. What expected from you are being patient, making yourself busy with good deeds, lowering your gaze, not watching movies, films, nude photos and etc, staying away from talking too much with marriageable opposite gender, making zikr wherever you go…
But if you want her for marriage and she refuses you, should not kill yourself by anger and worry. Put your complete trust upon Allah. InshaAllah He will give compatible person to you. This only happens when you are patient and hope from Allah good thing. Don’t forget that patience converts bitter to sweet. If you pass bitter of love with patience, InshaAllah you will live life of dignity and happiness. Be patient, rely upon Allah, make du’a, beautify your characters, don’t despair…
Working hard– sitting without work is base of destruction and depression. The mind wants to entertain itself by doing good works. When it becomes idle, it eats itself up like fire eating wood. Work is the rest of the mind. The person who earns by his sweat sleeps good sleep. But the one who earns by robbing or illegally can’t get peace of mind. If we make busy ourselves with good deeds, we don’t have time to commit sins. We sleep better sleep in night. We get peace of mind. Working hard for Aakira(hereafter) and this World opens for you gate of happiness and success
When you get out of this world, you take nothing except your deeds. There is no wealth that enter into qabr(cemetery) with us. All we used to amass remain behind us. So why are we deceived by this temporary world? No matter how much we chase this world, we will come to end. Foolish person among us is he who is deceived by this world. Wise person among us is he who uses this world to seek Aakira (Hereafter).
Frustration is reflection of your expectations.” If you expect something and it doesn’t happen, then you are frustrated and depressed. For example, if you do something for someone voluntarily and expect from him gratitude or other things, then you get frustrated and hate that person if he doesn’t fulfil your expectations. The only way we can escape from such frustration and depression is to do deeds for the sake of Allah, being sincere.
Alhamdulillah every day you become successful by doing what you can. Your failure is not only your end’s results. Rather it’s not doing every day what you should have to do. Not using time wisely is our everyday failures. This leads us to greater failure. Be successful everyday by doing good deeds no matter how it’s little/small. Even the ability of abstaining from evils is your everyday success.
When your future seems to you dark and hopeless, trust in Allah. Ask yourself this question, “Where was I yesterday? Where am I today? Who has brought me to this level? By only my effort do I reach this level or Who takes care of me????” Your answers should be like these: yesterday I was nothing. Allah brought about me from nothingness. Then He has taken care of me so far. I haven’t reached this level by my only efforts. But It is Allah Who brought me here. So why do I worry for my future while I have the best the Bestower Al-Wahhab, the Provider (Ar-Razzaaq), As-Salâm (The Source of peace), Al-Muhyamin (The Guardian)? What worry. Who has taken care of me so far how can He fail to take care of me tomorrow? My tasks are focusing on my goal, not wasting my time on worthless things and asking forgiveness for my sins…

Discover yourself. Aspire for great degree of success and thinking. Don’t limit yourself to money and fame. These are shallow things that pass like blowing wind. Discover your buried potential and resources within you. Begin your journey to discover these golds. Try again and again, do… Put your trust upon Allah.

Watchers or players?
Life is like stadium or field of game. Some people are watchers, some are players for goal, some are players without goal. Players use their efforts to get the ball into goal. They do their utmost. Sometimes they are winners and sometimes they are losers. They have supporters and opponents. Supporters and opponents can’t play. They are just watchers. 
On the other hand there are players who play without a goal I mean they don’t score records. They just play for refreshment and sport. 
Have you gotten what I am saying? The matter is not about football. Rather it is people and life. Many of us plays in the life without goal. We kick the ball toward any direction. We make little efforts. On the other hand those who play for the goal, they sacrifice their life to get what they want. This is analogy for those who have goal in the life. There are some watching game of life. Neither do they play for the goal nor without goal. So let us try our best to set up our goal in life. Play for the goal. Don’t be watcher. I started from myself. I had set up five goals.
“If you don’t act, you will be acted upon”

Turn away from people who bring to you tales /rumor, hearsay. They don’t come to you to benefit,rather they come to you to destroy you. They adorn their speech in order to take something so that you fight with that person. They make you suspect good person. Especially during your marriage be careful such people. If you take inappropriate information from deceivers, you miss golden opportunity, you destroy your home. And you too save yourself from transporting rumor,tales. Once you have lost honesty in your community,people hate you.

Many Wives
There was a man from Arabs who was known for having many wives throughout his life and it was said to him, “How were you able to keep so many wives?” He said,”When we were young, they stuck to me because of my youth. Then I had wealth and they were patient with me because of that. When my youth and wealth parted, all that remained were my good manners, and through them I live with my wives and they live with me.” 
So have good manner o my brother/sister to live good and long long life with your wife/husband. Choose a person who has good character for your marriage.
Taken from “Gems and Jewels” Page 207 by Darussalam Publisher and Distributer

The least thing you can do good for humanity is to refrain from harming them by your tongue, hands, wealth or any other means.

The more you beautify your character, the more you are loved. So beautify your character. “Speak good or be silent.” Beautify your speech. Walk on the earth without insolence. Try your best to pull out the feeling of pride from your heart. The ways to get rid of pride are to acknowledge your mistakes and saying sorry, showing humbleness toward poor, forgiving others, knowing yourself. Who we are? (Human being who will be turned to soil) From what we are created? (From sperm drop like mucus) What about our knowledge and wealth? ( All are given to and taken away from us by Allah) So how can we feel pride and insolence while we possess so much weaknesses?

If you focus on people’s faults and weakness, you are hindering yourself from advancement. Inversely, when you focus on your faults and weakness and try to fix them, you show rapid development and change in your life. Be Circle of influence not be Circle of concern. What do these mean? Circle of influence means to focus on yourself, on what you can change around you, on your weakness. While Circle of Concern means to focus on other’s faults, business, on what you can’t change, wasting your time on something that bring you nothing.
These terms are taken from ‘7 Habits of Effective people’ by Steven Covey

Bear in your mind the sprit of “InshaAllah I can do, let me try, it is possible…” Erase these notions from your mind,” I can’t, I haven’t, it is very hard and difficult, I have no time, this is impossible…” Try your best to inculcate first notions in your mind if you want success.

How can one deny or doubt The Day of Resurrection (Yomul Qiyyama) while weaks are being killed with no reasons and killers/oppressors are going freely without judgement? How are they left without judgement? There is no doubt in the Day Judgement.

I searched happiness in money, but I could not find there.
I searched in fame, but I could not find except worry
I searched happiness in Islam, Alhamdulillah I have found now real happiness that its spring never dry.

“Woman can be patient with man’s poorness, untidiness but she can’t be patient with man’s rude manner.” So be gentle and good mannerism toward your wife. For sister, choose someone who has good manner and imaan not the one who has mass of wealth but rude manner. You too have good manner.

Use your money wisely. By wasting your money, don’t sink into debt and asking people. Buy what you need direly and leave what benefits you nothing.

By reminding someone’s past faults, don’t embarrass him/her and wound the heart. Don’t blame me and publicize my past faults that I did in ignorance. Advise me so that I recognize my faults and fix them.

Never doubt help of Allah. If you start struggling and striving, indeed He helps you. But one thing or more is expected from you. That is- be sincere in your deed. Sincerity (iklaasa) is another key of success.

The more you feel regret (nadam) for your past sins, the more you run away from coming sins. If past sins seem to you nothing, then it is difficult to run away from sins. So by being regretful and repentant for your past sins, reform yourself today before coming of death. Beware that procrastination leads to worst destination. Repent to Allah sincerely today while you have a golden opportunity.

When some one refuses you for marriage, don’t threaten her/him. She/he has right to reject you because you may not be fit for her/him. By harbouring grudges and hatred, don’t harm yourself and her/him. Trust Allah.

No matter how much you love a person, one day either he leaves you or you leave him. So then with whom do you remain? Love Allah Who never leaves you alone. He is always with you.

No matter how much you consider yourself as weak, try and try what you can do and ask Allah for help. Be patient. Success is accumulation of patience, hardworking, tawakkul (reliance upon Allah) and du’a.

Every day to change yourself, seek the way, strive. Every person has distinct potential. Use your potential and mind to build yourself, to build the world. Show your landmarks(legacy) to those friends who try to belittle you and your work. No matter whatever they say, don’t go back from developing. If you want real change, you should pass over obstacles. Among these obstacles are toxic peoples who try to undermine your work. They try to poison your mind and works, and equate you with themselves. Stay away from such people. Thank Allah for blessings you have.

When gaining Pleasure of Allah and Jannah are your ultimate goals, what do you lose in life? When bad fortune strikes you, you be patient to gain pleasure of Allah. When good things befalls, you spend it to gain pleasure of Allah. So what do you lose? The one who makes pleasure of Allah and Jannah his/her ultimate goals is not shackled and enslaved by duniya, desires and sheytan. He/she leads happy life but his/her life is filled with fuel of struggle and strive. What an excellent and lofty goal it is!

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