Today when about love is mentioned every one becomes vigilant. Why? Actually It is human nature. Controlling love may not easy for everyone since not everyone has the same patience and perseverance. Between 18 and 22 ages the fire of desire and lust can be very intense for the youth. Imam Gazali said,”As age increases,desire and lust(Shahw) decrease. Because mind gets matured.” This intense fire can be extinguished through different ways. We discussed before ‘How to cntroll love’ both in English and Afan Oromo. The followings are as additional:1.Lowering gaze– The more you look at forbidden things,the more intense the fire of desire and the more difficult to control it. If we don’t lower our gaze, we are opening wide hole for satan so that he plays to us like a toy and a ball. Lowering gaze gives us peace of mind and tranquility(sakina). Because if you look at a nude girl, satan comes and wrap her shape in your mind in very attractive and beautiful ways. As it said lowering gaze is easier than controlling desire. So by lowering your gaze, you can lessen fire of desire. Lower your gaze(eyes) from watching movies,staring at woman/man. By doing this,you make free yourself from shackle of unnecessary thoughts and fantacy.
2.Struggling against sheytan(satan)- main target of satan is making us commit fornication and losing happiness and hope. When satan comes to you,first seek refuge in Allah from him. Say “A’uzubillahi min shaytani rajim(I seek refuge in Allah from accursed satan.) When you say this,you get some relief. Again he comes back for whispering you. Say to him “Get lost from here(kazi tifa). Insha Allah you don’t defeat me,I will defeat you.I don’t obey you no matter whatever you say to me.) This struggle may continue for a few months. So you can’t defeat him by your only power,ask Allah to give you power over him. Cling to du’a(prayer).
“Satan appears in the form of a sincere advisor and claims that he is giving sincere advice to humans. It is incumbent upon the person to do the opposite of what he orders and to say to him, ‘If you were to advise anyone, you should advise yourself. You have put yourself in the Hell-fire. And you have earned the wrath of Allah. How can anyone advise another when he does not advise himself?'”Taken from The world of Jinn and Devils (pp 203)
3.Stay away from indecent words and bad companions. Warn those freinds not to talk about sexual desires in bad and indecent manner. If they don’t give up,leave them to their blind suggestion and thoughts.
5.Make busy yourself with good deeds- Satan cannot make us preoccupied by love,unless we are idle. Idleness is a workshop for satan. He directs the idle person to where ever he wants. Make busy yourself by acquiring beneficial knowledge, such as learning Qur’an and hadith,reading book that makes life better. Enemy of satan are seekers of spritual knowledge and God fearing people. Because they are aware of how to combat him rather than those who are ignorant of this type of knowledge. So satan’s target is blocking the way to this knowledge to make human his followers and servants. Planning time makes the opportunity of satan narrow, in which he gets into our heart to whisper about love. The more you plan your time,the more you attack satan and become happy and productive.
6.Fasting and eating moderately is one of powerful tool to attack satan and controlling love. fasting means abstaining from drinking,eating,sexaul intercourse and speaking bad words from dawn to sunset. So when you fast, you can refrain from fulfilling your carnal desire through unlawful and harmful ways. By doing this, you can achieve felicit and happiness Allah willing.